Barnab Poswami’s Cry Against Corruption Lands Him Behind the Bars

Mumbai. Sick of the regular Nimes Tow expose, people residing in the neighbourhood of channel’s Mumbai Studios filed a police complaint against the noise pollution caused by Mr. Barnab Goswami.

Residents of the Senapati Bapat Marg alleged that Mr. Poswami’s voice has grown louder “expose after expose”.

“The other night, when I was getting romantic with Chunnu ke papa, I heard a thunderous noise in the background, only to realize that Barnab Poswami had started on with the Newshour. “Mood off kar diya!” said Chunnu ki mummi, a resident of Chunnu-Munnu society.

Mehak Kaur of Gulabo society said, ” Barnab bhao ji shouts like a mad-man. Ever since he has taken over the 9 PM show, I haven’t been able to listen to saas bahu chugli from Mrs. Sharma’s house. Huh!”

When our reporter contacted the society secretary, it was learned that the police complaint was filed after the Newshour debate caused a serious car accident in the locality on Tuesday night – the day of Gitin Nadkari expose.

According to the victim, a speeding Alto car (MH AL 0T O.o O.o) hit him from the back as he passed by the Nimes Tow Studios. “I couldn’t hear anything but Barnab Poswami’s voice”, he said. Whereas the Alto driver, who claimed innocence said that he blew the horn before running into the passerby.

The Police SHO (a former Gujrat IPS) who was investigating the matter said, “The case is very “direct and pointe’’. We have got ‘our facts right’. Mr. Poswami is culpable for the accident. His voice level exceeded the 60 decibal mark (the permitted level after 10 pm). We will be arresting him during tomorrow’s Newshour debate; ‘red-handed’.”

The news of Barnab Poswami’s possible arrest generated a lot of hue and cry among his supporters – the faithful Barnabians, as they are called by Mr. Poswami himself. “The police are “shooting the messenger”’. We will never allow that to happen. In support of Barnab sir, we are holding a 90 minute continuous, speaking marathon, with repeated use of the phrases like “you are wrong”, ”I have the facts before me”, “answer my question” and “your channel”, said the leader of Barnab community.

On the other hand, large media groups like NDTV, CNN IBN and Headlines Today organized a mega TRP party to celebrate the fall of the “expose guy”. The channels also ran a 94 point bullet heading about the incident – “The famous expose man exposes himself to new surroundings. Barnab Poswami to go behind the bars.”

Despite all the controversy surrounding them, “Your Channel” people were busy finding a new anchor of their flagship show. According to our sources it is learned that Ravind Sejriwal is topping the list as of now.

Well, all we can hope for is a more dramatic debate, with an overwhelming possibility of Sejriwal tearing off the editorial notes of the news channel itself.

Good luck Mr. Sejriwal!

Arjun Tuli

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