Children feel the pain

  • SumoMe

Domestic Violence, quite obviously, has a serious impact on the wife who is battered and flung about the house daily. However, the trauma is not faced by the woman alone; even the children and teenagers face serious emotional trauma. Studies have shown that at a younger age, the children tend to blame themselves for all the violence in the house. As we all know, children are extremely perceptive and even a slight disturbance in the house disturbs them enormously. Any instance of domestic violence and the child generally thinks that he or she is the cause of the disturbance. As the child grows older, it can lead to a subconscious or conscious feeling of guilt and in many cases, a feeling of deep hatred. There have been instances where a sense of inferior setting of home has led to the kid becoming a bully, and in extreme settings an anti-social. Beating of another kid becomes a way of displacing their own insult onto the other. The victim, then, mostly unconsciously at a younger age becomes a perpetrator himself. In school, many children tend to have problems with concentration and difficulty in interaction with peers.

Since they have a dysfunctional family at home, they are often forced to grow up faster than their peers. The eldest child of the house especially has to take on the greatest responsibility. He or she feels responsible about taking care of the house, the mother, younger siblings and dealing with nosy neighbors. The children are simply not allowed to have normal childhood; there is a certain innocence which just disappears at too early an age. They cannot trust their father who is the abuser and have to suffer from the daily anxiety of what trauma the day would entail. In some cases, the parents tend to use the child as an emotional weapon to try hurt the other. This evokes a lot of mixed emotions in the kid and anyone would find it difficult to come to terms with such a chaotic atmosphere.

Since there is a general distrust developed by the child at a very young age, he often finds it difficult to build any concrete future relationships. The sibling who faced the trauma together may also find it hard to become close to each other. There is no support from the family and they find it hard to become good friends or lovers. Incidentally, it has been often noted that those boys who saw domestic violence as a kid tend to replicate their fathers. The girls, on the other hand, show more chances of becoming passive victims themselves. The entire life’s journey gets totally disturbed by the violence seen at home.

It is important that while wives are given attention and through all kind of help are brought out of the clutches of domestic violence, children’s care should not be neglected at all. They also should be given psychiatric treatment or a friendly chat so that they may to try to come to terms with the demons of the past and move on to a better life.

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