What is it about this sport that drives the whole nation of India mad? What does this game have that has given it the unique distinction of being elevated to the position of religion in India? What is it about it that drives most of the subcontinent countries, unites people across religions and places?
If you take a look at what the game is simply, it is actually quite illogical and might even look stupid. If the intellectual, logical people like Aristotle and Socrates had known about this game, they would have simply laughed at the people who play it and would have laughed even louder at the stupidity of the people all over the world watching it so keenly and getting all worked up over it and yet they would have missed something very beautiful because this game, as indeed other games are not for the intellect. It is not logical and it is not productive. A group of players on a ground, one hurling a ball, another one trying to hit it and the rest of them so focused, running after it so desperately! For what? It is simply counterproductive. It is just like the joke on football that someone who saw the sport of football for the first time saw so many people running after one ball and wasting so much energy just for kicking it, he remarked- Why not have one football for each of them so that they can all kick to their heart’s content!
In this game, it is the rules that make the game and it is the final result that decides everything. No matter how well a player has played, if the team has lost, even if by a run, every one of that team and its supporters will be sad. So it’s not how it was played that matters but what the final result is. The journey is more important than the destination but in sports it is not so, which is sad. Games are meant to be played for enjoyment and enjoyment should be derived from the very process of playing.
So, yes this game is illogical, meaningless, nothing productive is coming out of it and there is no point to it but yet in spite of all this, there is something magical about the game.
Below is a small description of a funny event of Cricket that would take place if 11 of the famous people of different fields played this game
* Disclaimer- This is not meant to make fun of any well known figure in any field.
1. 1. Moses would give 10 commandments- one to each of the other 10 players
2. 2. Buddha would be made the third umpire and he will go on looking with his half-closed eyes, sitting in the lotus posture and every decision referred to him would be ‘The Middle Way’- neither out, nor not out.
3. 3. Krishna would steal the player’s clothes from their dressing rooms and cover up the stadium light towers with his ‘Sudarshan Chakra’ to delay the match and bring in Duck-Worth Lewis in the favour of his team.
4. 4. Osho would play spoilsport and disrupt the match any which way
5. 5. J.Krishnamurthi would oppose all traditional methods of playing
6. 6. Mahatma Gandhi would refrain from hitting the ball as it would be violence and when a bowler will uproot one of the stump, he will show him the other stump.
7. 7. Bruce Lee will take a nunchaku instead of a bat and since one bowler would be nothing for him, he will ask multiple bowlers to bowl at him at the same time, and still he will hit all those balls out of the boundary.
8. 8. Rafael Nadal will ask for a clay pitch
9. 9. Roger Federer will ask for a grassy pitch
10 10. Isaac Newton would be stationed on the boundary and as the batsman would hit the ball in the air and it would be coming down towards him, instead of taking the catch, he would start explaining the concept of Gravity acting on the ball to the audience
11 11. Edison would be so engrossed in his bowling that he will forget how many balls he has bowled in the over and go on to bowl 10,000 different deliveries without success of getting the batsman out and finally remark that he has not failed but he has found 10,000 deliveries that don’t work!
Achyut Telang is a PhD Research Scholar at IBS Hyderabad. He completed his MBA in Marketing from Mumbai in 2009. He has a lot of hobbies and a passion for writing. Some of his hobbies are drawing portraits, writing poems and blog articles, playing the piano, reading books, sports, games etc.
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