It Does Not Matter!!! Really?

As per the Indian Constitution, she is way beyond the magical age of 18 years and hence can proudly claim to be an adult. By adult I mean, a modern female who lives the way she wants and does what she likes. She is neither too religious nor an atheist. She holds a liberal political view and lives on her terms and condition. She believes in marriage but is not against the concept of ‘live- in’ too. She is very open about the relationship with her boyfriend, pre- marital sex and everything which might be or rather which is considered as a taboo in the Indian society.

Adding to all this, the one thing that might certify her as a truly modern girl is the fact that she doesn’t care about the conventions of the society and thinking of the people. But is it the truth? Does she really not give a damn to the society? Does she really not think even once before passing through the steps which lead to her boyfriend’s house on the first floor in a three storeyed building? Doesn’t she doubt her friend’s words when they wish her a good weekend before she leaves to spend two days with her boyfriend? Well, in all probability she might say no. But in reality the truth might just be a little different from this.

She has no name, she has no identity but yet, she is every second ‘modern Indian girl’ who has decided to break all the conventions, but at heart, to some extent, she still cares as ‘to what people will think.’ This is not the case with this sex but with the opposite sex as well. No matter he/she will claim that they don’t care about anything and they are independent people with free thinking, still, these thoughts bother them at the back of their brain.

So, there is nothing called as ‘I don’t care about the society’ & ‘I don’t care as to what people will think.’ This is an ideal situation which does not exist in any society, at least, not in Indian society. You might be highly educated, independent, free minded, liberal, unconventional but still when it comes to controversial issues like this, all this goes for a toss. You might term all this as just the passing thoughts so as to make your soul comfortable. But hey! Have you realized that it is not just a thought process but a kind of ‘FEAR,’ A ‘FEAR’ of being wrong, a ‘FEAR’ of not being able to prove yourself. And this feeling, alone, can destroy the peace of your life and can force you to contemplate and contradict with yourself on most occasions.

There is no end to this thinking or better put, no end to this fear. This situation can be best defined as two sides of coin. You can either choose ‘Heads’ and do whatever you want to do and don’t give a damn to the society or you can choose ‘Tails’ and stop doing whatever you are doing which according the society is ‘not so good.’ Still, if you are confused then there can be a middle path i.e. to keep your fists tightly closed without bothering about ‘Head’ or ‘Tails’ which means confidently keep on doing what you are doing and let these thoughts come and go and play with you! In other words, give the explanations when the world asks otherwise consciously choose to ignore them but proving yourself in the near future so that those open mouths shut and those wide eyes come to its normal size.

Thus to sum up, there is no obvious answer to all these questions. In fact you need not answer anyone but find an answer for yourself. Delve deep in your heart and think about what you really want and not just what you like superficially. The call entirely depends on you. The coin is also with you, the two sides of the coin are in front of you and the decision to close your fists also rests upon you!!!

Avani Jain