No Strings Attached: Movie review

Romantic comedies are based on the tagline “A boy and a girl can never remain Just friends” where as a sex comedy is based on the fact that “All that matters is sex.” When one tries to make a romantic sex comedy, the amalgamation of the two taglines seems like a good idea, which brings us to “A boy and a girl trying to keep their relationship strictly physical when down the line between all the sexcapades, they realise they want more.” No strings attached revolve around the same cliché of a boy and a girl trying to be friends with benefits and ending up being soul mates with benefits. Before we go further with the storyline and cinematic paraphernalia, let’s have a look at what makes romsexcom a success:

a) Hot couples. (99% weightage)
b) Nudity. (60%)
c) Good music. (90%)
d) Divine revelation followed by some running in the end. (100%)
e) A side-line love story most probably involving protagonist’s best friends. (40%)
f) A happy ending.(100%)
g) Secret ingredient (weightage unknown)

If you add all these ingredients in the correct quantity you will have a hit box office romantic-sex-comedy. If this was to be the case then every movie would be a super hit but the success and failure of a movie solely depends on the secret ingredient. Nobody knows what the secret ingredient is but we can only make an estimate by looking into the flaws of the movie.

No String attached stars Ashton Kutcher (Adam) and Natalie Portman (Emma). Emma is a medical resident who is busy and reasonably horny, she needs a man who can provide her with a quick f**k whenever she desires minus the relationship tag. The boy toy Ashton Kutcher fits the description. They start off as friends with benefits but soon Adam develops feelings for Emma. Emma does not want a relationship and things get complicated.
What’s Hot?

a) Both the actors are in their prime. Natalie is charismatic as ever and Ashton is best at what he does. (taking his clothes off)
b) The movie has its share of sex scenes and comic moments (not worth mentioning), for ardent fans like me they have thrown a scene where the camera focuses on Ashton Kutcher’s most prized asset (his butt).

What’s cold?
a) The prerequisite for a successful romantic comedy is good music but the movie disappoints everyone. No popular and heart-warming soundtrack makes the movie a dead beat.
b) Every romantic movie is supposed to have a divine intervention scene at the end of the movie; a scene where one of the actors realise his/her mistake. He/she recognise the value of true love which is followed by a chase scene where he/she runs/drive towards his/her soul mate with beguiling music playing in the background. The ending is dull and lacks lustre.
c) The movie has a side-line love story which involves protagonists’ best friends but unfortunately it failed to make a dent.
d) The movie has a happy ending but lacks the happiness quotient, it felt more like “this is a romantic movie and we are meant to be together in the end, so let’s not make a big deal out of it.”

The chemistry between Adam and Emma was lukewarm. Some of the scenes were poorly written and after a while it would be hard to resist a yawn. Some of the characters were left hanging in the end, like what happened to Adam and Emma’s best friends? What happened to Emma’s co resident who was trying to score with Emma? What was the story behind Emma’s boss? There was a significant pH imbalance between Natalie and Kutcher probably due to a huge difference between their heights. Over all, the movie has a predictable story, predictable ending and a poor soundtrack but still worth a watch for all the beautiful faces and butt cheeks.

Rating: 5.7/10.

Bhanuj Saharan