The pain of losing myself

The jungle was dark and the trees were tall,
I could walk along them but preferred to crawl.
They were talking in a language alien to me,
Their movement was synchronized, like the school of fish
moving in the sea.

I went with the tide and collected whatever I could,
Everything looked valuable as I couldn’t differentiate
between diamond and wood.
I tried to turn over every stone in the jungle whether big
or small,
I pushed myself to every limit to stretch the leather ball.

I made good friends and the tortoise was my best friend,
We played with birds and went completely round the bend.
I learnt new facts, created a new world which I fancied so
Never knew that everything would be lost by that single

We lost our way in between and got separated from the group,
He found his way but I couldn’t move as I was tied to the
I started living on my own in the new world,
Picked up many stones and liked some,
But they were getting heavier as I was away from the herd.

It rained, it snowed and I enjoyed the nature,
Never noticed that fungus had covered the stones and they
had lost their stature.
I wandered around with a hope to survive,
But the ocean was too deep and I didn’t know how to dive.

When I had lost the hope, suddenly the tortoise appeared
from nowhere,
He was rich and had new friends but they were covered by
I sat on his back and crossed the dark water,
He said I shouldn’t lose hope and trust the nature.

I knew that the water would harden in winter and melt
in summer,
I knew that nature would complete the circle on time, like
the runner.
But the fantasies had turned off my brain,
I was being worse than an insane.

Finally a new lesson was learnt and the tortoise left me
when the water turned into ice,
He had a job to do for which he was being paid a hefty
I thanked him and continued my journey ahead,
I could imagine how difficult it would be to find a new bed.

There were many of my kind, whom I met during the journey,
The only difference was that they knew the problems and the
way to find the key.
They said I had lost myself, should change my attitude,
I followed their advice and thanked them with gratitude.

I knew that the journey ahead was to be done on my own,
No one, but I knew my strengths, which were deep inside
I knew the ambitions were erupting inside me,
I had to let that plant come out and convert into a tree.

So here I am, standing in front of multiple doors with the
keys in my hand.
I have to unlock the doors using the right keys to prove my
I believe that I can do it and that’s all I need,
I will use the best food to nurture the seeds.

Swinder Kaur