The Twilight series has taken over the world ever since the first movie released way back in 2008. Starring Kristen Stewart and then-unknown Robert Pattinson, the movie gave rise to millions of teenage fans and a few middle-aged women (one of them went on to write a bestselling erotic novel based on Edward and Bella). And as the number of fans rose, so did the hatred.
The internet did not forgive the “next Harry Potter” comment, or even worse: “better than Harry Potter”. Memes came up ridiculing Kristen Stewart’s lack of expressions and Bella’s preposterous admiration of Edward. Stephen King insulted the author, Stephanie Meyer, and feminists decried the book for advocating wrong notions to young girls. Even Robert Pattinson is known for his hatred of the books going so far as to say “should never have been published”.
Now finally, we see the end of the series that sparked a million other vampire romance novels (and in some cases, zombie romance novels). The final book, Breaking Dawn was split into two parts; not because of too much plot in the book (hardly anything happens in Part 1) but to increase box office earnings. This movie however, spiked my interest considering this time, Bella the vampire would be strong and formidable; something Bella the human could never pull off. Alas, these hopes too were destroyed.
The movie starts with a rather long title sequence, taking its time to introduce (probably) each and every vampire, human and the werewolf in the movie. Zooming out of Bella’s blood-red eyes (which have super-vision now) we see the standard scene for any Twilight movie—staring deep into people’s eyes.
Pick-up line of the movie: “We’re the same temperature”.
One thing I’ve never understood is why Edward looks like he is always in pain, even when he is happy. From what I understand, being a vampire is like tripping on LSD.
I’ve always felt sorry for Jacob the werewolf. He never really stood a chance with Bella and now he’s fallen in love with a baby. He couldn’t help it apparently. Poor Taylor Lautner went from playing shirtless for the majority of a film, to playing a paedophile. Which brings me to the point of the baby: Did they not have enough money to cast a real baby and not have a creepy CGI version? I can see why the Volturi want to destroy it.
And though Bella is supposed to be powerful and ferocious, the scenes in which her anger rises are inexplicably funny. It is either that Kristen Stewart really does have no acting ability, or the thought of Bella hurting someone seems way outlandish.
When the Cullens go looking for vampires who would ally with them and support them in front of the Volturi, it seems like we’ve left the premises of a vampire romance flick and into a less-funny, less-cooler version of a superhero movie.
At one point, the movie does get interesting; Michael Sheen easily takes the prize for the least-unforgivable performance in the series. It starts with one beheading, until Alice comes along. A full-on battle sequence ensues with one, two, countless heads being ripped off and bodies burned. The earth splits in two and the vampires and werewolves alike fall to the depths. The battle continues for a while, until the audience realizes it was all merely a vision of what could come if such a battle started. So no one actually dies. Ever.
The final scene shows a sort of recap of all the googly eyes, slow breaths, speechlessness and vomit-inducing scenes that were the entire Twilight series. Honestly, if this was done earlier, countless hours of thousands of movie-goers could have been saved. Nevertheless, Twilight has ended and is not something we can erase from the history of movies, so one might as well have fun making memes ridiculing various aspects of the series.
The dialogues in the movie are as cheesy and horrible as ever. Some scenes in the movie prompt me to wonder how the board deemed this movie safe for kids and teenagers to watch. The acting is mediocre at best, even by actors who have proven their worth in other movies; the plot is clichéd and filled with ambiguities; the special effects are ghastly and Bella’s voiceover has a smaller emotional range than a teaspoon.
Twilight, if not for the romance, would never even have made the floor of the editing room. If you’re not a fan of the series, do not spend valuable time and money to see the movie.
Image Source [http://www.breakingdawnmovie.org/breaking-dawn-part-2-calendar-with-new-image/]